Friday, January 09, 2004

Note To Self.....

Self...smoking won`t fix this, you know. I don`t know why you`re even entertaining the thought. You`re doing everything necessary to combat the depression. Things will level out soon....they always do. You`ve got to hang on to that. Yes, it`s hard. Yes, it`s tiresome and frustrating. But it ends. You can ride this out the same way you`ve ridden out every other lousy thing that`s happened. But not if you smoke. If that happens, you`ll think this black mood was a walk in the park. It will get infinitely worse because you`ll have thrown away 8 hard earned months, you`ll have disappointed yourself and everyone that loves you and has supported you all this you`ll look like an ass! really don`t want to smoke. Think of how well you can breathe now. What about all the things you were able to splurge on because of quitting? Do you want to go back to having pinching every penny til it shrieks? I don`t think so. Think about the confidence and self respect you have gained. C`mon, self...snap out of the junkie thoughts.What about Mom? If you go down, she just might throw away her 11 days. You know you couldn`t take that. Just a few weeks ago, she didn`t care if she lived or she`s quit. Yes, its wrong to guilt trip you like that. One shouldn`t get wrapped up in another`s quit...but this is MOM. If you carry on, maybe she will too. You know you`re the one that convinced her to quit. She thinks if you can do it, she can do it. So be it. Show her you can and are doing it. Smoking isn't an option anymore, NO MATTER WHAT.


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