Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Damn Niece...

CJ has been saying more and more lately that she wants to quit. It's always going to happen "once this pack's finished", though. :~( She'll be 17 next week and has been smoking full time for a couple of years. She says she was about 9 the first time she tried smoking. I found out she was hooked right around the time that I quit. What brilliant timing that kid has! lol *rolleyes* She can barely afford to eat half the time, I'd like to know how she affords smokes at 10 bucks a pop. But then, she lives in a hostel...I'm sure her housemates have no problems with scoring her smokes. I wish she'd get the hell outta there. The dude that runs it is a real creep. I hate the way she's gone from flophouse to flophouse since her mother kicked her out, though. At least she's been there (at the hostel) for longer than a month. I offered her my basement when the crap hit the fan at home...was even planning to renovate not only the bedroom, but the rec room area for her, but she wasn't into that. She could have a stable home where people actually treat her with respect, she could be in school, she could have her own space. The basement door has a lock on it, for cryin out loud. She could be worrying about the sorts of things that 16 year old girls should be worrying about, like boys...learning to drive...mid-term exams...the prom. But no...she'd rather sponge off kiddie welfare so that she can sleep til 3 pm and stay out all night doing christ only knows what. Figures she's "all grown up" now. I keep telling her that most grown-ups have a little thing called a job, but I'm obviously wasting my breath there. I probably could've forced her to move in with me, but for what? To have her pull the same crap here that she was pulling at home? I know that most of her rebellion was a direct result of how she was treated at home...but old habits die hard. I'm not stupid enough to think that the kid would revert to completely acceptable behavior once under my roof. I love her, but I also know her well. She's no angel by any stretch. She'll do anything she thinks she can get away with, and she has a very rich fantasy life, so to speak. In short, your classic troubled teen. Damn, I could kick my sister. Her daughter is so bright...has so much potential...and instead of nurturing that, she destroyed it. Bitch, moan, nitpick, shriek....bitch, moan, nitpick, shriek....over and over ad nauseum for 15 years. Never a word of support or praise...just bitch, moan, nitpick, shriek. I better shut up now. This is turning into a rant about stuff I can't change no matter how much I may want to.


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