Guess Things Are Back to Normal...

...over at the Q. Or what passes for normal, anyway. LOL Flames have always flared up there...it's a bunch of nicotine addicts kicking on an internet site, after all. Over the last few months, I've noticed most of the shit is caused by the same 3-4 people. As I said before, there's nothing wrong with telling it like it is, or calling people on their lame excuses, but these 3-4 people are absolutely cavalier with people's feelings. They don't hesitate to ridicule and dismiss people as not being serious about quitting. Those horrible threads yesterday were all started by the same attention-whoring old woman, were quickly joined by the usual suspects...then the animosity seemed to spread like wildfire. :~(

I'm kind of a hardass about smoking now. I have to be. But I just can't imagine being that way to someone already in the throes of guilt and shame. People aren't going to listen to what you're saying if you're pointing at them and laughing while you say it. I think it's better to try to help someone figure out why she screwed up, than to laugh at her and call her a loser. This is why I stay out of chat rooms, and only visit 2 forum boards. I used to hang out in chat a lot, and lurk on quite a few boards, and I got quite the insight into the pack mentality. It was pretty scary to see some of the stupid shit people would fight about. It was even scarier to see the dogpile effect...one or 2 ppl would start the fur flying with someone, then the next thing you know, 6 other ppl are ganging up.. I got sick of it...it quickly lost its appeal. That's why I liked the Q...sure, there were flames, but they burned out really quickly...and it was basically limited to once or twice a week;. The Monday Gadget Debate and the Wednesday War Zone. The rest of the week was pretty good. Now, every time I go there, I see the same people making really rude, cutting comments to new quitters...and even to older ones. There's this one guy that just blows my mind. If someone with a long quit is struggling with an urge, he shows up and tells them that they can't be serious about their quit if they feel like smoking now...and even questions whether they've been quit as long as they say. This asshole has less than a year quit, but feels free to belittle the quits of people with 2-3 years behind them.

They can also be supportive, sure...to those that they deem worthy. The ones who struggle and slip, though...omg, its nasty. With any luck, the "perfect quitters" will move on. What gets me is that if they are as strong in their quits as they claim to be, why are they posting at the Q every single day? I think its for the attention, myself. They sure don't seem to want to help the average joe, just the exceptional "put em down & don't look back" quitter. I don't even think helping has anything to do with why they're there.